Redefining a Gift.

Gold, Frankincense and Myrrh, how many times have we heard about these gifts? Are they just words we hear again and again during Christmas sermons or nativity plays, or do they re-define how we think about giving meaningful gifts?

You might be like me, and find it hard to start really getting my head into the Christmas season until at least December 1st, and even then I’m probably more of a last minute gift-er than someone who really plans ahead (much to my detriment). But this year my husband and I find ourselves in a much different financial position than we have been in years gone by, which adds a layer of complexity to the season of giving. I took voluntary redundancy from my job in tech about 18 months ago before going part-time at a charity while pregnant with our first child, and in the last 8 months I’ve been on maternity leave. This has been a huge adjustment, but a deeply transformative one in many ways. It has forced us to consider how we spend our money, challenge any sense of lack we might feel, as well as release us to take bolder leaps of faith where we might have been shackled by finances (a story for another time). 

I could tell you about the rich blessings (and confronting challenges) of living off less has been for us, and the lessons I’m still learning, but to keep to the topic, let me tell you about some recent thoughts I've had around giving gifts.

I’ve become very aware how much easier it is to give extravagant and seemingly generous gifts when money is no issue. I have always considered myself a generous person, when money was no object. I used to send flowers consistently (just because), or easily buy someone above and beyond what they asked for their birthday, but these days we’re just not able to give gifts in the same way. I won't go into Christmas and consumerism, we've all heard it before. I think many of us are starting to feel a bit more numb to the 'Black Friday' bombardment and advertising frenzy at this time of year. Each meticulously executed television advert expertly designed to pull on heartstrings with luscious soundtracks and emotional storylines sound more and more like clanging cymbals; a lot of noise with no real substance.

I’ve been challenged to consider whether people truly feel less loved because I can’t afford to buy them gifts as I used to, or whether I still consider myself a generous person because I’m unable to spend as much money as I have before? What really is the meaning behind giving a gift, and when does it lose that meaning? Can I still give deeply loving gifts without the same resources available to me? 

When I think about Gold Frankincense and Myrrh, yes, these are costly gifts, but there’s more to them than that. They are prophetic.

Gold symbolises kingship. 

Frankincense, divinity. 

Myrrh, sacrifice. 

These gifts aren’t random, they deliberately confirm Jesus’s identity and calling as king, priest and saviour. Even more, these gifts are deeply useful, both practically and spiritually. 

If I re-define my gift giving based on the essence behind these gifts from the Magi, that is, to speak prophetically over a person's life, and to provide practical and spiritual use, perhaps I feel more able to give gifts of significance, despite not being able to afford half the things thrown at me on social media every 2 minutes. 

I don't write this as a person consistently giving meaningful gifts as they were meant to be here. This is a challenge I’m giving myself this season. To be creative with giving, and swim against the tide of materialism and the lie that somehow I am unable to show someone how much I value them without offering 'expensive' gifts.

What does a gift look like that builds up my friend in her identity? That perhaps encourages my sister in her spiritual growth? Perhaps something my neighbour needs practically (that costs my time, but not my bank balance)? 

Maybe it’s simply a heart-felt letter, full of rich words of encouragement. Maybe it’s a second hand devotional, well used but with words no less valuable in building spiritual muscle? Perhaps it’s offering to de-weed your elderly neighbours garden so they have something nice to look at out their window? 

These things don’t cost the world, but perhaps they’re more in line with the gifts of Gold, Frankincense and Myrrh. 

This doesn't mean you need to take that fancy cleanser or new trainers off your Christmas list, it’s simply an invitation to you, and to me, to think differently about gifts this Christmas. Perhaps if we think about giving gifts in this new way, rather than feel restricted by financial limitations, we could actually be more generous, and give more abundantly to more people than we initially thought?

Just some thoughts I'm having.

Sophie x